


why is there blood on my new couch, dean.

by lockedupinalittleroom



Series: new lives, new couches. oh look, blood. [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Canon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Archangel Gabriel (Supernatural), Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Cat Owner Gabriel (Supernatural), Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Dead John Winchester, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Dog Owner Gabriel (Supernatural), Dog Owner Sam Winchester, Established Castiel/Dean Winchester, Established Gabriel/Sam Winchester, F/M, Fallen Angel Castiel (Supernatural), Gabriel Loves Sam Winchester, Human Castiel (Supernatural), I Don't Even Know, I Tried, I Was Drunk When I Wrote This, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Lies, Love<3, M/M, Married Gabriel/Sam Winchester, Mentioned Adam Milligan - Freeform, Mentioned Crowley (Supernatural) - Freeform, Mentioned Jessica Moore - Freeform, Mentioned John Winchester - Freeform, Mentioned Kate Milligan - Freeform, Mentioned Kevin Tran - Freeform, Mentioned Lucifer (Supernatural), Mentioned Metetron, Mentioned Michael (Supernatural), Mentioned Raphael (Supernatural), Mentioned Ruby (Supernatural) - Freeform, Not Beta Read, Not Canon Compliant, Post-Stanford Era (Supernatural), Prompt Fic, Sam Winchester Leaves for Stanford, Sam Winchester Loves Gabriel, Secrets, Stanford University, The Author Regrets Everything, This Is STUPID, Why Did I Write This?, but also lies<3, cat owner Sam Winchester, gabe's dog is named mani, i think it was a good prompt but like. i cant write, im tired and found a weirdo prompt i liked dont @ me, mentioned Benny Lafitte, not really but honeslty close enough, there is one line dedicated to jess' marriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-21 23:48:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30029751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lockedupinalittleroom/pseuds/lockedupinalittleroom
Summary: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/728668414708022202/ + https://www.pinterest.com/pin/AXt_4TISZK453-uU2TbvOYNFwYl8HLq0dPoxONWdQ4QEsbAvDai4SaM/prompt 1: "Hey! I haven't seen you in ages!" "I'm glad to see you, too. But would you mind explaining to me why there is a corpse in my living room?"prompt 2: "Why are there WEAPONS in my bathroom?"dean never picks up sam from stanford to find dad.
Relationships: Blurry Woman (Supernatural: Carry On)/Jessica Moore, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Gabriel/Sam Winchester, Jessica Moore/Original Character(s)
Series: new lives, new couches. oh look, blood. [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2209122
Comments: 3
Kudos: 37





	why is there blood on my new couch, dean.

If Sam had to expect something wild and outlandish when he came home, it probably would’ve been Gabriel sitting naked on the couch, or a pair of cats Gabriel failed to inform him that he’d found on the street, or something like that. Maybe even a burglar or something, or one of their three cats getting loose.

The very last thing he would’ve expected, even below finding Gabriel having an affair or the president him-fucking-self (or even Gabriel having an affair with the orange fuck himself), was his brother hurriedly trying to patch up what looked like a corpse, with Mani sitting quietly and politely beside them. On Sam’s couch. A bleeding corpse on his beige, _so very easily stainable_ **_new_** couch.

The couch was the first registered problem. Second, of course, was the fact that he hadn’t seen his brother in years. 

Sam silently closed the door to his apartment and stood awkwardly in front of it, completely lost. Dean didn’t seem to have noticed him yet.

“I--” Sam tried. Dean looked up, revealing the fact that his face was scratches and bruised and covered in blood. Despite this, it split in an almost actual smile.

“Hey, Sammy, long time no see!”

Sam blinked. “No. No, yeah, yeah, no, good to see you too, but… I… Why is there a corpse on my couch?”

“He’s  _ not _ dead,” Dean insisted, despite the fact that the not-dead corpse was covered in what looked like it’s body mass of blood. 

“It’s on my new couch,” Sam murmured to himself as he brushed past. Arthur, a brown tabby and their first rescue, meowed at him from the bathroom door. Sam poked the door open and froze for a millisecond.

“There are  _ weapons _ in my  _ bathroom, _ Dean,” Sam said, hurrying to pack the guns and knives away under the sink, where hopefully Gabriel wouldn’t look before he got a chance to hide them well.

“No big deal, Sammy, just weapons,” Dean said, his voice frantic.

“Dean.” Sam looked disbelievingly at him. “There is a  _ corpse _ on my couch--”

“Not a corpse.”

“There are  _ weapons _ in my  _ bathroom, _ could you not contact  _ Dad _ ? Can you ever  _ not _ be extra, Dean, I swear to god--”

“Sammy, don’t tell me you forgot how to clean up a body,” Dean said, trying his best at a joking tone. It didn’t work. “You haven’t been gone that long.”

“First of all, it’s been twelve years, second of all,  _ my h-- _ my  _ spouse is due home any minute _ !”

Sam picked up the body--person? It did groan just a little, but Sam might’ve been hearing things--in a bridal carry and carefully laid it in the bathtub. Dean rushed over and sat on the toilet beside it. In a canvas bag was a bloody trenchcoat and a dress shirt, which Sam assumed belonged to the shirtless body/person. Bandages were wrapped around its torso and deep cuts were sewed up all over its body, along with dozens of scars, bruises, and--surprise, surprise--more blood.

Sam pinched the bridge of his nose. Dean waved away Toffee, their orange-eyed calico that had been quite literally thrown into Gabriel’s bookshop two years ago. One of her ears were torn off, as was her tail, and she didn’t hesitate to hiss at Dean, who looked tempted to hiss right back were it not for his brother in the room.

“Can you--are you---what the hell?” Sam said, exasperated. Toffee and Arthur perked up and rushed out of the bathroom and to the front door. Sam rushed after them, slamming the bathroom door behind him and dragging an old blanket out of the closet to toss over the couch. He leaned awkwardly against it as Gabriel stepped in and closed the door behind him. Arthur, Toffee, and Mani meowed and barked enthusiastically at him, which called Bella from her hiding spot somewhere in the apartment. Gabriel glanced at Sam suspiciously as he tried giving all the cats and the dog attention at once.

“Hey, Sam,” he said, “what’s up with the couch cover?”

“Nothing! Nothing, just, uh. Thought it looked… gaudy.”

Gabriel glanced up. “ _ Gaudy _ ?”

Sam nodded. “Yup. Gaudy.”

Gabriel raised and eyebrow as he walked over to Sam, grabbing his hands.

“Sam,” he said seriously, “what did you do to the couch?”

“I didn’t--no--I didn’t do… anything.”

Gabriel looked wholly (and fairly) unconvinced. “Uh-huh.” He stood on his tip-toes to kiss Sam on the lips before quickly grabbing the sheet and pulling it off. Gabriel blinked at the blood for what seemed like an eternity.

“Samuel, what the  _ fuck _ ?”

“I--I d---It’s---I’m--I mean--” Sam stuttered.

Dean poked his head out of the bathroom. “Sam?”

Gabriel locked eyes with him. Dean slowly closed the door. Sam could feel his soul leaving his body.

“Sam,” Gabriel said slowly, “who was that?”

“I’m--my--my brother?”

“Your brother,” he repeated. “The one who sided with your dad when you left for college twelve years ago?”

“Yeah?”

Gabriel sighed.

“Alright--” he began to say as he slammed open the door to the bathroom, before blinking at the scene before him. Dean blinked back. The body’s eyelashes fluttered ever so slightly. Sam wondered if he could die more than once.

“What,” Gabriel said, whipping his head back around to look at Sam, “in the  _ fuck _ is happening here?”

“G’br’l?” the body muttered, barely audible. Everyone’s head whipped around to stare at it.

“Ca--oh, for fuck’s sake,” Gabriel stormed past Dean and his complaints and placed a hand on the body’s stomach, which glowed golden for a moment before Gabriel pulled away. The body suddenly gasped and sat up, coughing up blood.

“Cas!” Dean exclaimed, placing a hand on his back and shoulders. Sam stood frozen in front of the bathroom. The three cats edged toward cautiously and curiously.

“Gabriel?” Cas asked between coughs. Arthur placed his paws up on the side of the bathtub.

“Castiel,” Gabriel said emotionlessly.

It was silent for a moment.

“Um,” Sam said, “anyone wanna explain what the hell is going on here?”

Dean exchanged a glance with Castiel, who glanced at Gabriel, who sent a sort of sad look towards Sam.

Sam had gotten out of the hunting life when he was eighteen, and he’d moved to California to get his law degree. During the first year, he’d had to live in a cheap, shitty apartment with four stoners (one of which he suspected was a hooker) that always smelt like weed, and he’d had to work every other odd-ends job he could get to afford living. In the middle of his first finals, he’d bumped into someone at his regular coffee shop. It had been a short, snarky, golden man who’d had whiskey eyes and a dog, which was pretty much Sam’s type, but just then he’d been half brain dead from testing and didn’t have time to consider much of anything.

That summer while Sam was working (at his regular coffee shop, coincidentally), the golden man had strolled in at the same time, twice every week. 8:35AM on Mondays and Tuesdays. It was one of the only really constant things in his life at the time, and for a while, he’d felt a kind of comfort in the strange man that would sometimes seem centuries older than his looks claimed.

After three months of quick conversations during the beginning of the week, Gabriel had asked Sam out. Sam had said yes. Sam had met Gabriel’s dog, a terrier named Mani. They proclaimed themselves boyfriends. Yada yada yada.

A year into their relationship, Sam moved in with Gabriel. It was great. Of course, they had fights, and no one could get on Sam’s nerves like Gabriel, but it was  _ wonderful _ . 

Sam went to an interview. He got into the school. He got a job as a lawyer. Gabriel proposed. They adopted Arthur. Jessica was Sam’s maid of honor at the wedding. Bella kept getting into their apartment somehow so they ended up adopting her. Sam was Jess’s man of honor. Toffee got unceremoniously thrown into Gabriel’s bookshop one day when it was storming so hard you could mistake it for nighttime. 

They had a good life. Sam was the godfather of his best friend’s two year old, Abigail. Gabriel was the soon-to-be-godfather of Jessica’s second child. Sam and Gabe had a small apartment with big windows and a big kitchen and a balcony and good wifi, and it was a short walk to public transportation and a 24/7 corner store and they were happy with their lives.

Dean’s life had been, to put it mildly, a bit more interesting.

First off, when he was twenty-six, his father went missing. In a desperate bid, Dean began to search for his younger brother at Stanford. He was going to get his help. He  _ had been _ . Was going to.

Dean got a glimpse of Sam, happy, living a normal life, with pets a home and boyfriend, and decided that maybe he missed his brother, but his brother didn’t appear to miss him. He couldn’t fuck with Sam’s life anymore. He could find his father by himself.

Dean hunted by himself. He occasionally paired up with a man named Garth. He flipped through his dad’s journal furiously. He found a missing page. He found Adam Milligan and taught him how to hunt. He cried when Kate Milligan first called him ‘son.’

Dean gets the Colt. His father gets possessed. They get hit with a car. John sells his soul. Adam gets thrown into a battle royale. Dean sells his soul. Jake Talley opens the Devil’s Gate. Sam gets a cat and a fiance, Dean finds out.

Dean gets sent to Hell. Castiel gripped him and raised him from Perdition. Adam goes behind his back with a demon called Ruby.

Lucifer is raised. Kate gets killed by a demon. Adam says yes.

Heaven brings back John Winchester. Michael possesses him.

Dean doesn’t know how he does it. But he ends up pushing his brother and his father into the Cage. Castiel is brought back, without his Grace. Dean teaches Cas how to hunt. They get roped into helping Crowley and stopping Raphael from taking over Heaven. Balthazar sacrifices his Grace to Castiel.

Raphael is killed. Castiel pulls the Leviathans from Purgatory. Meg helps Dean find Cas. Dean and Cas get thrown into Purgatory.

Dean and Benny escape. Heaven pulls Cas out. Dean goes against everything his father beat into him and tell Cas how he feels about him

Naomi wipes everything away.

They barter with Crowley. Cas gets his memories but is sent to Earth as human.

There is silence for a year. Kevin is dead. Castiel and Dean hunt together

They meet an angel named Metatron. He banishes angels from Heaven.

An angel tries to kill Castiel. It almost works. Dena is desperate, and he has no other help, so he does what he vowed to not do:

He visits Sam, and he plans to beg for his help and forgiveness.

It doesn’t end up that way.

  
  


Sam sits in the kitchen, staring into nothingness as Dean, Castiel, and Gabriel sit around him. His brother. A fallen angel. And his  _ husband _ , the archangel Gabriel, who’s backstory is apparently nothing but a lie.

**Author's Note:**

> i literally dont know why i wrote this but. its out there ig. anyways, if you wanna come scream with me on discord: https://discord.gg/mpRcuQRZHw


End file.
